Feel Good Story of the Year, Veterans Day Style

Classy move by these thieves:

The 21-year-old University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee student said he was walking home from work about 1:15 a.m. Tuesday when he was pulled into an alley and told to lay face down and with a gun to his neck. Four men took his wallet, $16, keys, his cell phone and even a PowerBar wrapper from his pants pockets, he said.

But the hostile tone quickly changed when one of the robbers, whom the reservist presumed was the leader, saw an Army ID in the wallet. The robber told the others to return the items and they put most of his belongings on the ground next to him, including the wrapper, the reservist said.

"The guy continued to say throughout the situation that he respects what I do and at one point he actually thanked me and he actually apologized," said the reservist, who asked not to be identified Tuesday because the robbers still had his keys.

The reservist said he asked the men, who all had hoods or hats covering their faces, if he could get up and they said he could before starting to walk away.

"The leader of the group actually walked back, gave me a quick fist bump, which was very strange," he said.

Romans

I was recently musing to my buddy about Cincinnatus. I told him that he either (a) was a consul who let his son be executed in accordance with the laws, or (b) held back the Gauls on some bridge and sacrificed himself for the army. Either way, I told him, Cincinnatus was a fine Roman.

From Livy and Plutarch, via Wikipedia:

Titus Manlius Torquatus:

During the conduct of the war, Manlius and his co-consul, Publis Decius Mus, decided that the old military disciplines would be reinstated, and no man was allowed to leave his post, under penalty of death. Manlius's son, seeing an opportunity for glory, forgot this stricture, left his post with his friends, and defeated several Latin skirmishers in battle. Having the spoils brought to him, the father cried out in a loud voice and called the legion to assemble. Berating his son, he then handed him over for execution to the horror of all his men. Thus, "Manlian discipline."

Horatio at the Bridge:

Horatius was in command of the Pons Sublicius on that fateful day when the Etruscans through sheer numbers broke the Roman will to resist in the meadow near the bridge on the right bank of the Tiber River in the fourth year of the Republic – 506/505 BC more or less. The date varies by about five years depending on the dating scheme used by the historian. Horatius must have watched with dismay at the end of the bridge as the Etruscans effected a massacre of Roman troops milling about waiting to get across. When the Etruscans began to cross with the fleeing Romans Horatius and two front-line general officers: Spurius Larcius and Titus Herminius, stood guard to sift friend from foe and kill the foe.

Horatius' status as commander of the bridge probably gave him the authority to countermand the retreat ordered by the two senior officers when the friendlies were all across. Ordering them to have the bridge torn up he stationed himself behind a pile of corpses and held off the attackers, returning their missiles and preventing them from approaching. In astonishment they stood at a distance and hurled more missiles. Just as the bridge became useless he received a spear in the buttocks and leaping into the water in full armor swam to safety though given a crippling wound. Subsequently he became a retired disabled veteran held in high public honor and set at ease financially from the public treasury.

Finally, Cincinnatus:

Cincinnatus was regarded by the Romans, especially the aristocratic patrician class, as one of the heroes of early Rome and as a model of Roman virtue and simplicity. A persistent opponent of the plebeians, when his son was convicted in absentia and condemned to death, Cincinnatus was forced to live in humble circumstances, working on his own small farm, until he was called to serve Rome as dictator, an office which he immediately resigned after completing his task of defeating the rivaling tribes of the Aequians, Sabinians and Volscians.

His immediate resignation of his absolute authority with the end of the crisis has often been cited as an example of outstanding leadership, service to the greater good, civic virtue, and modesty.

I was close, sort of. Either way, Cincinnatus was a fine Roman.

Who Dey!

Bengals fans know how to attend NFL football games.